Welcome to my world - The world of Tish

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

When life isn't looking, don't run naked

Remember "Fried Green Tomatoes"? I loved the part where Kathy Bates has to squat over a mirror to examine her woman-hood in order to love her body. Oprah had an article some time ago that instructed the reader to stand in front of a full length mirror for 5 minutes. The purpose was to get past the imperfections and love the skin, the muscle, the curves that God gave you. I made three minutes before my husband wondered what was going on.

Maybe it's me, but nudity is over-rated. We all have the same parts, right? Large or small, nipples are the same shape unless you have had some botched surgery (and I am sorry if that is the case!). Butts, whether round or flat, have the same anatomical structures. From a woman with the FA (Flat Ass) syndrome, take it from me, round reared people - you have the world on a string and just don't know it. Pants are made for you, skirts adore you, and let's not even talk about swim suits!

As for the genital areas, come on, people, it's all the same. Yes, there are size differentials, girth issues, but when it's all said and done, lives aren't saved with a couple extra inches. Grooming for women makes the largest difference, but unless you are into the whole pain thing, choices are still limited for that "Brazilian" look.

Think about it this way - if everyone was naked, there would be no need for the Gap, Dillards, Victoria's Secret or Fruit of the Loom. There's a reason clothes make the man: man without clothes makes him a target for paintballs in the most tender of areas.

So I vote normal people are never naked. Showers and bathtubs are exempt, of course, but the whole nude beach movement can fade away. Let the movie stars with airbrushing and cosmetic surgery on demand keep flaunting their bare breasts and penises until they melt during a rainstorm or freeze from too much Botox. I'll take a comfortable pair of jeans and sweatshirt anytime.


  • I agree with you on almost all points. The only exception is cool whip. I have to strip naked to cover myself in cool whip. Otherwise, I find the cleaning bills to be outrageous. Plus, it just feels better naked.

    By Blogger Phil, at 10:29 AM  

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