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Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Guess I'm wearing Prude Panties Now!

There I am, minding my own business (as usual), drying my hair at 6:45 am. Little did I know that my children would be exposed to VERBAL PORN so early in the morning.

Give it to me baby, nice and slow
Climb on top, ride like you in a rodeo
You aint never heard a sound like this before
Cause I aint never put it down like this S
oon as I come through the door, she get to pulling on my zipper
It's like it's a race who can get undressed quicker
Isn't it ironic how erotic it is to watch you in thongs
Had me thinking 'bout that ass after I'm gone
I touch the right spot at the right time like something,
i like something,
she like it from behind
So seductive you should see the way she whine
Her hips so slow mo' on the floor
when we grind Long as she aint stopping, homie I aint stopping
Triple wet with sweat, man its on and popping
All my champagne campaign, bottle after bottle, its on
And we gon' sip the heavy bubble, now every bottle is gone

AND THIS IS ON THE POP RADIO STATION!! "Candy Shop" is a long way from "Candy Man", I can tell you that.

People, if this isn't one step away from indecency then just break out these lyrics for the preschoolers:

She getting crunk in the club I mine she work it
Then I like to see the female twerking
taking the clothes off BUCKEY naked ATL.
Hoe don’t disrespect it P
a pop yo pussy like this cause yin yang twins
in this B.I.tich Lil Jon and the East side boys
wit me and we all like to see Ass and tities
Now bring yo ass over here hoe
and let me see you get low i
f you want this Thug Now take it to the floor (to the floor)
and if yo ass wanta act you can keep yo ass where you at

Yea, that's what I want sung on the playground. I can't wait until my son tells a girl to 'crawl'. Maybe he can get a couple of other boys and do a sing-along or 'round'.
I guess some music executive decided that calling women bitches might not go over with the masses, so they've substituted the word female in its stead. Hmm, I think denigration of women crawling on the floor makes the point with or without the word bitch, but thanks for the effort.

This is far beyond what was scandelous in my time. Madonna sang "Like A Virgin" and was banned on many Bible Belt stations. Marvin Gaye stunned the nation with "Sexual Healing" but I doubt he would be proud of this new strain of musical mysogeny. Sure, we all enjoyed Def Leppards "Pour Some Sugar on Me" and even laughed at Quiet Riot's "Cum on Feel the Noise", but there's no comparison to their innuendos and the explicit instructions given today on radio stations across the country.

Of course, radio is like television. If you don't like it, turn it off. But why is Janet Jackson's two second boob shot controversial but insideous songs aren't? Why aren't radio stations held accountable when a five year old riding to school gets more sex ed than the schools are allowed to provide? I'd bet that the kids watching the Superbowl won't remember Nipplegate BUT they can recite verbatim the chorus to "Candy Shop". We teach our kids their ABCs with songs, so why not sex and hate? Sounds good to me.

I don't want to listen to Lawrence Welk, or folk music, or only instumental pieces. All I want is to turn on my radio in the morning and hear the weather, some news, and a Top Forty hit that doesn't deserve an R rating. Is that too much, really?

10 Comments:

  • You're not a prude.

    When we lived in Washington DC, we heard 3rd grade boys calling 3rd grade girls bitches and Hos.

    I once asked a high school girl if she slept with men for money and she got all bent out of shape. I let her finish yelling and asked her why she let her friends call her a whore if she wasn't into prostitution.

    She couldn't answer...bitch.

    Seriously...I don't care what kind of profanity is used in pop music as long as it isn't played over the public airwaves. Some would argue that these lyrics aren't profane, but they are indecent. Then again, societies definition of decency has been deteriorating for hundreds of years. I can't wait to see what happens over the next 50.

    By Blogger Müzikdüde, at 10:52 PM  

  • You forgot Jackson Browne's Rosie..."But Rosie you're all right -- you wear my ring
    When you hold me tight -- Rosie that's my thing
    When you turn out the light -- I've got to hand it to me
    Looks like it's me and you again tonight Rosie"

    Never knew what this song meant when I used to sing to the radio back in the day!

    By Blogger The Ugly American, at 9:06 AM  

  • Wait, you understood the words? All I ever get out of the song is "Welcome to the candy shop, I'll show you what I got" and something about licking lollipops and that's it (other than a couple 'Whoa' grunts that don't really qualify as words).

    What is actually kind of interesting to me is that there is a conservative backlash across the arts except for rap music (maybe b/c so few people understand what they're saying?). There's a big To Do on judging erotica for the Ritas (go to romancing the blog for the scoop) just to name one example. Then there are the debates as to whether or not authors should use swear words in their fiction.

    I don't know. I find songs like that offensive (once I understand the lyrics), but how do we censor it AND keep free speech? I don't know.

    Of course, my favorite rap song was one from a couple years ago that went something like...

    "I want to lick, lick, lick, lick you from the head to your toes" along with lots of oral sexual innuendo.

    I adopted it as the theme song of my dogs who are very affectionate with their tongues.

    Michelle

    By Blogger Demented M, at 9:57 AM  

  • Great post. Agree fully but on the other hand, I like instrumentals.

    By Blogger GM Roper, at 12:39 PM  

  • OMG, I can't believe what I just read. Not that I'm surprised that songs like this exist. My DD came home from a slumber party last month and was a bit embarrassed because all the other little girls (10 yrs old) knew the words to this song "Candy Shop" and she'd never heard it. I think I'm glad she hadn't (and couldn't remember how it went).

    Songs like that should not be played on top 40-type stations, IMO. Not that my opinion carries much weight....

    By Blogger Tricia Fields, at 1:19 PM  

  • I don't know about prude panties- what do they look like ;>0)

    We have to face it as a culture, the time has come to make a stand on just what kind of music we are going to tolerate. DOn't give me that "FREE" speech crap.
    Yo Canna maka pointana withoutta vulguraaa worrddss. Yo canna maka a songa withoutta beeiina an S&M sangera tooa.
    I mean what are we teaching kids that listen to this as music much less ENGLISH.
    Someone years ago wanted to make EBONICS a official language? She wasa shotta outta the parka ona thaaatta oneanna... Miraculously it wasnot overturned by the 9th distric court. Ona accounttta they coudn ottaa unnstanda.

    I have XM Radio Tish- go online sign up for 3 day pass and listen to the LOFT channel 50 - great tunes without you knowa.

    What color are Prude Panties? Are they worn only certain days?
    Becausa I gotta knowa...
    Have a great day..
    k

    By Blogger ikw3804, at 1:38 PM  

  • I nearly spilled my overpriced Starbucks tea on my laptop. You are hysterical, and I totally agree. My entire sixth grade art class mosey-ed on in singing the Candy song yesterday...I guessed about 20% of them were oblivious to some of the undertones of the song, but other 80% were well ware of the verbal porn. Gotta love the radio. Ay.

    By Blogger ClaudBLOG, at 1:43 PM  

  • I just posted about this today. You are so right on as always!

    By Blogger ShoeHound, at 4:53 PM  

  • The lyrics are horrible for sure these days.

    But I'm with Michelle... I can barely understand all of what they are saying.

    By Blogger Snidget, at 4:51 PM  

  • Better not to enjoy advertising such scum

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 5:29 AM  

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