Welcome to my world - The world of Tish

Friday, April 22, 2005

The "Bolton" PTA Hearings for Tish..

Image hosted by Photobucket.comThis meeting has now come to order. We are hear for the confirmation of Tish as a PTA member, delegate to the third grade class. Do any of the members have any questions for Tish?


Image hosted by Photobucket.comVP Boxer: I do, if it pleases the committee. First, we have sources that link you to an incident of gay bashing in 1976. How do you respond to these charges?
Tish: Are you talking about third grade?!
VP Boxer: Don't answer a question with a question, young lady. Did you or did you not have an incident in 1976 where you called two boys homosexuals for holding hands?
Tish: Yes, but--
VP Boxer: But nothing. Now, my sources also tell me you have taught your children not to like smoking. Does that mean that smokers are bad people to you, Miss Tish? Aren't you demonizing innocent smokers to your young children?
Tish: I am just trying to keep them from smoking. What does this have to do with joining the PTA?
VP Boxer: That is not for you to know, Miss Opinionated. Chairman Hagel, I think you should take over. The applicant is being less than forthcoming with me. (sigh)

Image hosted by Photobucket.comChairman Hagel:Young lady, do you feel that your conduct in college represents your character?
Tish: I guess it depends. We all do and say things in college that we might regret later.
Hagel: Do you regret your attitude towards cheerleaders, sorority girls, and fraternity boys? Do you regret the many nights of partying and carelessness perpetrated on your fellow classmates?
Tish: I wouldn't use the word perpetrate since they were active participants.
Hagel: You are arrogant and unruly. From what we are being told, you bully your patients into submission. Your children seem to have their father's good sense not to speak their mind at the drop of a hat, which will serve them well in the future.
Tish: Wait a minute--
Hagel: I will not wait a moment longer. My decision is made but I shall let our Senior school board member, George Voinovich close today's proceedings with a vote.

Image hosted by Photobucket.comVoinovich: I hold these PTA members in high esteem and appreciate their time and energy assembling next year's committee. What I have heard today about Tish is not only disturbing but makes me wonder just what kind of mother do we want on our PTA. Reports of disciplining her children IN PUBLIC and other shameful parenting techniques bring into question her ethics and more importantly, her integrity. She just doesn't pass my "kitchen" test. If she can't stay pregnant and in the kitchen with her mouth shut, she doesn't belong on my PTA. This meeting is adjourned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Written in light of the current John Bolton confirmation hearings. Whether you are a Democrat or Republican, Libertarian or Green Party, the direction of these proceedings has taken a ridiculous turn, wouldn't you agree? Dredging up someone's prom date, or a co-worker from ten years ago - come on! Who doesn't have those types of skeletons in their closet? Mother Teresa, maybe, but I am sure someone would bash her for the whole 'poverty' thing.

9 Comments:

  • Righteous , high-five!!!!!!!

    By Blogger void, at 6:15 PM  

  • This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    By Blogger void, at 6:15 PM  

  • You are so awesome Tish!

    By Blogger The Ugly American, at 8:36 PM  

  • When I come back here, I become more and more jealous of your writing prowess. This is what a blog should be.
    Also, I don't see your name on my message board....on second thought, don't start posting on there, you'll make me look bad.

    By Blogger Mike Seay, at 11:24 PM  

  • WOW! It must be a day to bash cause in my post today, I'm bashing the BBC!!

    By Blogger mrsmogul, at 2:35 AM  

  • That was priceless! ha ha ha ha

    Lord help us all!

    By Blogger Suzanne, at 8:37 AM  

  • Very, very good!

    By Blogger Sigmund, Carl and Alfred, at 5:39 PM  

  • My first visit and you had me rolling in the aisles. Oopps, the sergant at arms is coming, I better go....

    By Blogger Mr. RB, at 9:24 AM  

  • I would sincerely hate to be questioned on details of my life like that. I agree, its become a little ridiculous.

    Great writing....you are hilarious!

    By Blogger Brian, at 8:47 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home