Welcome to my world - The world of Tish

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Bathsheba: She's more than a pretty face

Today's guest is Bathsheba, the infamous other woman.

Tish: So glad you could join us on such short notice, Bathsheba. Can I call you Bath?

Bathsheba: I prefer Bathsheba. It's a lovely place you have here. Mind if I stretch out?(rolls around on the chaise lounge and purrs) Aren't you married?

Tish: Yes, happily so.

Bathsheba: Oh, thats' what they all say, honey. (sighs) So, is he around, your husband?

Tish: NO! Let's finish this interview, okay? And cover up, for Pete's sake. You're not in a music video. My readers are interested in your side of the whole David situation.

Bathsheba: I was married to Uriah and one day, David saw me taking a bath. That's the short version. Is your father still living?

Tish: No more questions about any men in my life, okay? What about your vows to Uriah? Didn't you think twice before sleeping with the king?

Bathsheba: What could I do? He was THE King, Tish. When a King sends for you, you have to go. Sure I didn't like Uriah getting killed, but that was David's decision. It wasn't like it was all roses for me. Our first son died, you know?

Tish: I know, and I can't tell you how sorry I felt for you about that. I don't think I could survive losing my son.

Bathsheba: It was hard but then I had Solomon so I had some comfort in that. How old is your son?

Tish: (Gritting her teeth) Not old enough. I think that's enough for this interview. Thanks for coming by. You can go now.

Bathsheba: Oh. (Peeks out of the window to the backyard) I see you have a small pool of water out there. I think I need a bath...(begins to disrobe)

Tish: PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON, YOU SHAMELESS HUSSY!

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SOFTBALL UPDATE: WE WON THE TOURNAMENT! Of course, Drama Diva ROCKED and Team Mom made a complete ass out of herself by CRYING WHILE RUNNING ONTO THE FIELD!

Next Sunday, there will be no interviews. Our crackerjack staff will be on a three day holiday without internet connection. I know, where in the world could be without the internet? That would be the parents. But don't worry, the weekly ramblings of Tish will continue until Friday.

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